Dear Hearts,
There are ways to meditate. Some better known include, mantras mudras, TM, Zen, Yoga, ACIM, or contemplation. There are countless more techniques. In a world of so many options, ego believes more is better. For me, too much of a good thing scatters focus and diffuses energy. Spiritual seeking can fall prey to exciting samplers of diverse practice but depth in none.
My path has its roots in Catholicism which gave way to Alternative and Spiritual Psychology. That opened the door to a psychological self-study through A Course in Miracles. I am a long ear in that arena, about 30 years ripe. In addition, the Catholic-mystery infused writings
of the saints and Gnostics captured my heart. More recently, I am influenced by scribes Mari Peron and Sebastian Blaksley.
Sifted to its core, my life long explorations have brought healing and deepening in Spirit. Practice, community and a teacher have been essential. Healing leads to unity which is synonymous for me, with Christ, Jesus (Jess.)
My personal learning classroom is depth writing in relationship with God, experiencing the love and wisdom of Mary Mother, Magdalene and others but primarily, conversations with Jess, the Beloved and embodiment of Holy Spirit. Scribing is a practice of listening. The desire to hear the Voice for Love peels away the illusory self allowing truth a Presence, an expression, a Voice.
Perhaps every practice, every lesson, book, mantra, inner or outer teacher I have studied, perhaps all of my relationships with creation are part of God’s innovation to purify my fear-based ego, bringing it into the service of Her true and divine nature. And yet, Jesus says something shocking. He suggests, Love’s meaning (enlightenment) appears in just one inner movement preceded by honest wanting to have perfect communication, wholly willing to let everything that interferes with it go. CIM-15.V.42
Just one instant holds all that I desire, Who I am, Life. In that tiny slice of devotion, the once-defended heart opens in total welcome. The self is offered humbly. Everything unlike Love dissolves.
Deep appreciation to those of you who read my poems and essays. The one below
expresses a holy instant.
We meet again for ACIM on Thursday, September 9 at 7:30 pm. See the link below.
Come join with us and explore the Love of God.
All Love,
MaryBeth
Into Oneness
He says he hears me.
Thoroughly, truly, completely.
He knows me intimately.
Yet I feel as if I am deaf and mute,
groaning and grunting in a gross attempt
to express,
an emphatic need
to communicate,
to create just a word or phrase
to assuage the desire of this
heaving wanting-ness.
My heart as if paralyzed
cannot convey but in spasm,
the pain of trying to say…
something
that makes sense,
that connects,
that pours the melted butter
of my heart
into the hollows of his bread.
He knows.
He understands.
He too longs.
He too loves.
And with one arm,
pulls my head to his breast
as if I am a little child.
I rest there, my eyes closed
and breathe His scent.
The longing slips away
into oneness.